It’s well known that bipolar suicide is premeditated. It’s not an outburst or a momentary impulse. It’s a silent process where, little by little, you start organizing your things, saying goodbye without anyone noticing, and preparing the exact moment to leave.

The strangest part is the calm that comes once you’ve made the decision. There’s no anxiety, no fear. Just a kind of relief in knowing that the suffering is about to end.